![Picture](/uploads/2/6/6/2/26621970/1344341.jpg?337)
I guess I could spend a lifetime like this - dreaming of things and then never quite finding a way to make them happen amidst the routine of everyday life. My own experience has certainly made me appreciate just how much drive and focus a person needs to make things happen in spite of these inevitable peaks and troughs. I have a newly realised admiration for people who follow their dreams, start something up, initiate change in their lives, think outside the box or pursue their passion especially against the odds or against the critics. It takes more than just drive but also confidence and belief and ultimately they are the qualities that feed everything else.
When I decided to leave my stressful job a few months ago to pursue a life less manic, it was as as result of a long and fraught decision making process and a lot of self-reflection. This produced a heady rush of inspiration, ideas and unwavering drive about what I wanted from my life and how I was going to achieve it. I wanted to retrain, start-up this, study that, play about with this on the side, all whilst bringing in some money, having some time with my children and yes absolutely.....fulfilling some passions! I still want all of that, very much, but umm........where did my momentum go? I don't even know. I was only reminded today, chatting to this friend, that my verve for new directions and projects has not been around lately and I hadn't even really noticed. Possibly because I'm now actually living a life less manic, feeling pretty chilled and have got a far less stressful job, I am not lurching forwards grasping around for new opportunities. Nonetheless, I miss verve. I'd like it back in my life.
Somewhere in the matter of the last couple of months, I've come across a couple of obstacles or perceived deterrents. I've subsequently questioned myself and unwittingly allowed a little fear to creep in. The belief and confidence shakes a little and without even realising I've mentally shelved a couple of projects which if I'm not careful will end up relegated to the "unfulfilled dreams" basket of my life.
Sod that! I can make them happen.
I'm off to find my momentum!